And here's why. A hundred years ago, people generally were virgins until marriage. So if George went out on a date with Betty, he wasn't cheating on her if he went on a date with Martha a couple days later. Single people used dating not as a scheme for getting laid, but as a way of getting to know each other well enough to decide if marriage ...(and then baby-making, etc.) was a good idea. So there was no reason for anyone to be suspicious or jealous before marriage, because "cheating on" was a term that only applied to married people who were having "affairs."
Then there was the sexual revolution, and everything just got screwed up and confusing for single people. Dating was suddenly about having sex, not learning about each other and making friends. So now if George starts dating Betty, he has to be her "boyfriend," and she's his "girlfriend," and if two nights after he bangs Betty, he goes out with Martha, he's "cheating on" Betty. So he's having an "affair," then. So why not simplify things? Just eliminate words like BOYFRIEND and GIRLFRIEND and the status "in a relationship." Because if George is humping Betty and they're IN A RELATIONSHIP, they're just "married," but without the license, the ring or the "til death do us part" commitment. They're informally married until they get tired of each other. And then they're "divorced." Because really, if someone has a Facebook status of IN A RELATIONSHIP, that means they're not available for "dating," otherwise they'd be "cheating," which isn't really much different than just being "temporarily married."
The "it's complicated" status is kind of funny. It can mean anything except "single and available." So it's just another creative way of saying "temporarily married, but without the license or the commitment." For example, it could mean "married temporarily, but don't like it, but I'm emotionally attached to this moron and hoping someone will rescue me from my nightmare by riding in on a white stretch limo and having an affair with me." So IT'S COMPLICATED!
Now that I've said all that, I really think everything would be much simpler for us single people if there were only four statuses: Single, Engaged, Married, and Free Again.
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Friday, December 2, 2011
Life: Choose Your Own Hell
I used to love the Choose Your Own Adventure books series when I was a kid. It seemed very realistic that all throughout the story you could make choices. (I really liked realism.) Then you would turn to a specific page, based on a specific choice, and read on from there until you're faced with more decisions, etc. The story turns out very differently for each person who reads the book. Same story, same book, different outcomes.
I woke up this morning thinking life is a Choose Your Own Hell story. Or Choose Your Own Nightmare. It's as if, by living life, we know that regardless of which choices we make, the end result is going to suck. I know that's not true, it just seems like it sometimes. Life really is just an ADVENTURE, and nothing worse than that. But it's like an Indiana Jones adventure, where all the rules are written by the same jerk who wrote Murphy's Law. If you fire your revolver, it will be out of bullets; if you're thrown into a pit and sealed in, the pit will be full of snakes; if you're imprisoned there with a beautiful woman, she'll (naturally) be someone who hates you; if you succeed in finding the Ark Of the Covenant, some brilliant idiot will make sure it gets hidden forever in a vast Smithsonian warehouse.
But, over all, it was a great adventure... right?
I woke up this morning thinking life is a Choose Your Own Hell story. Or Choose Your Own Nightmare. It's as if, by living life, we know that regardless of which choices we make, the end result is going to suck. I know that's not true, it just seems like it sometimes. Life really is just an ADVENTURE, and nothing worse than that. But it's like an Indiana Jones adventure, where all the rules are written by the same jerk who wrote Murphy's Law. If you fire your revolver, it will be out of bullets; if you're thrown into a pit and sealed in, the pit will be full of snakes; if you're imprisoned there with a beautiful woman, she'll (naturally) be someone who hates you; if you succeed in finding the Ark Of the Covenant, some brilliant idiot will make sure it gets hidden forever in a vast Smithsonian warehouse.
But, over all, it was a great adventure... right?
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
Mysteries, Secrets and Friendship
Reality isn't so obvious, not as uncomplicated as people would like. To understand calculus, one would have to first understand algebra. To comprehend algebra we have to know multiplication and division. But before we can comprehend those mysteries, addition and subtraction must be mastered. In other words, a person has to EARN the privilege of understanding the deeper mysteries of mathematics.
Knowledge is earned the way the core of an onion is discovered if there's no knife to cut with. At first an onion is a root bulb made of multiple layers of thin, waxy paper. That's the truth, and it can't be denied. But that's not the complete truth. When the wrapper is peeled away, the white onion itself may be found beneath. So there's a papery wrapping with an onion inside. That's the truth, difficult to deny. But it's not the whole truth. There's more mystery beneath the surface of the outermost layer. That peeled away, there's another layer beneath. True, but that's not all there is...
Particle physicists discovered the smallest, most elementary particles of matter after generations of onion-peeling. And they're still looking for that one Theory of Everything. Far from being satisfied with what they know, physicists are still EARNING the right to know the secrets, the hidden mysteries of matter.
Why ask me how a magic trick is done? Why ask me to tell you any other secret? I tell people what they've earned. If you want to know more, earn it. That's how God is with the mysteries of creation, both material and spiritual. And I'm not better than God, so please don't expect more from me.
Be a friend and you'll earn more than a distant, disinterested person who doesn't care what I did today. That's a good start.
Knowledge is earned the way the core of an onion is discovered if there's no knife to cut with. At first an onion is a root bulb made of multiple layers of thin, waxy paper. That's the truth, and it can't be denied. But that's not the complete truth. When the wrapper is peeled away, the white onion itself may be found beneath. So there's a papery wrapping with an onion inside. That's the truth, difficult to deny. But it's not the whole truth. There's more mystery beneath the surface of the outermost layer. That peeled away, there's another layer beneath. True, but that's not all there is...
Particle physicists discovered the smallest, most elementary particles of matter after generations of onion-peeling. And they're still looking for that one Theory of Everything. Far from being satisfied with what they know, physicists are still EARNING the right to know the secrets, the hidden mysteries of matter.
Why ask me how a magic trick is done? Why ask me to tell you any other secret? I tell people what they've earned. If you want to know more, earn it. That's how God is with the mysteries of creation, both material and spiritual. And I'm not better than God, so please don't expect more from me.
Be a friend and you'll earn more than a distant, disinterested person who doesn't care what I did today. That's a good start.
Friday, July 29, 2011
Seven Billion People: What's So Special About You?
This year the global population is estimated to pass the 7 billion mark. Seven billion people, and I'm one of them. That's like looking at a sea shore and picking out a single grain of sand... that one's YOU. So... what's so special about you? What sets you apart from the others? If you can honestly answer that question, you're miles ahead in the human race.
The question has bothered me my whole life. I see myself as being special in my own way, as having something unique to offer, but in the end I'm nothing more to the rest of the world than another grain of sand. I think the worst, most pointless state of existence is a person who doesn't have any answer to that question. No dreams, no goals, no purpose but the completely mundane. The second most useless state of humanity is my own. To have talents, dreams, goals, vision, something to offer that would benefit the world, but all of that potential is wasted. It's like granules of gold imbedded, unnoticed, in pyrite. The world doesn't care, it doesn't recognize the value.
Funny, I can see the unique value in every human being. Every individual has her/his crucial place. A parent either raises a child up to become a world-changing gift to humanity, or the parent raises a drug-addicted thief, or maybe a serial rapist or killer. Same parent, same child, different parenting practices in alternate potential realities.
I also see how a massive pile of human sand that refuses to participate in the status quo could collectively alter the future for the better. Humans follow the crowd. What if the crowd nearest you decided it's just not gonna take "it" anymore? It being tyranny or ignorance or callous indifference to human suffering or evil or WHATEVER. Not only are they not going to take it anymore, but also they're going to CHANGE it. If I was nothing more than just another grain in that world-altering sand pile, I could feel proud of my minuscule stature.
The question has bothered me my whole life. I see myself as being special in my own way, as having something unique to offer, but in the end I'm nothing more to the rest of the world than another grain of sand. I think the worst, most pointless state of existence is a person who doesn't have any answer to that question. No dreams, no goals, no purpose but the completely mundane. The second most useless state of humanity is my own. To have talents, dreams, goals, vision, something to offer that would benefit the world, but all of that potential is wasted. It's like granules of gold imbedded, unnoticed, in pyrite. The world doesn't care, it doesn't recognize the value.
Funny, I can see the unique value in every human being. Every individual has her/his crucial place. A parent either raises a child up to become a world-changing gift to humanity, or the parent raises a drug-addicted thief, or maybe a serial rapist or killer. Same parent, same child, different parenting practices in alternate potential realities.
I also see how a massive pile of human sand that refuses to participate in the status quo could collectively alter the future for the better. Humans follow the crowd. What if the crowd nearest you decided it's just not gonna take "it" anymore? It being tyranny or ignorance or callous indifference to human suffering or evil or WHATEVER. Not only are they not going to take it anymore, but also they're going to CHANGE it. If I was nothing more than just another grain in that world-altering sand pile, I could feel proud of my minuscule stature.
Lionheart's Living Free Rules #1-6
1: Materialism and the passionate desire for CRAP YOU DON'T NEED is the root of all evil.
2: The only physical needs you have are water, food and temperature regulation. Everything else is optional.
3: Life is roughly half horrible and half wonderful. Accept that and stop complaining. Whichever half you focus on will determine whether you are happy or miserable.
4: When choosing a career, do for income whatever you would do just for fun. If you hate your job, choose a brand new career based on this rule.
5: Debt is slavery. If you don't have enough of your own money to pay cash for it, you can't afford it. And if it's not one of the necessities mentioned in LIVING FREE rule #2, you DON'T NEED it. And if you most likely couldn't sell it within 30 days at a solid profit, it's probably not a wise investment. So don't buy it!
6: Fear no person, fear nothing. Ultimately, the only person, place or thing that has any power over you without your PERMISSION is God. Almost nothing you're inclined to fear will happen, and if it does, SO WHAT. What's the worst that could happen, you die? Unless you're an enemy of your Creator, there's no such thing as death! Fear of failure, pain, discomfort or death will only inhibit your freedom and keep you from success!
2: The only physical needs you have are water, food and temperature regulation. Everything else is optional.
3: Life is roughly half horrible and half wonderful. Accept that and stop complaining. Whichever half you focus on will determine whether you are happy or miserable.
4: When choosing a career, do for income whatever you would do just for fun. If you hate your job, choose a brand new career based on this rule.
5: Debt is slavery. If you don't have enough of your own money to pay cash for it, you can't afford it. And if it's not one of the necessities mentioned in LIVING FREE rule #2, you DON'T NEED it. And if you most likely couldn't sell it within 30 days at a solid profit, it's probably not a wise investment. So don't buy it!
6: Fear no person, fear nothing. Ultimately, the only person, place or thing that has any power over you without your PERMISSION is God. Almost nothing you're inclined to fear will happen, and if it does, SO WHAT. What's the worst that could happen, you die? Unless you're an enemy of your Creator, there's no such thing as death! Fear of failure, pain, discomfort or death will only inhibit your freedom and keep you from success!
The Federal Government Will Never Balance the Budget In This Generation
I'm making a dark prediction, not based on any special prophetic knowledge from God, or any insider information. This prediction is based entirely on nothing more than common sense. In this generation of voting adults, our federal government will never balance the budget or stabilize the economy or give us the opportunity to fully realize the American Dream. That's because the steps that would be necessary to return America to its pre-1930 prosperity would be too drastic for even American voters to accept, much less Congress. So instead, nothing but temporary and unstable patches will ever be applied to this modern economic disaster.
What would need to be done if we were to have a balanced and stable budget and a sound economy? Here's my short, abbreviated list:
1. Remove all of our troops from everywhere except within the borders of the USA. Not just Libya and Iraq, EVERYWHERE. No more world-policing.
2. Decriminalize all drugs, not just marijuana. States should be solely responsible for substance abuse laws, and if the federal government stopped spending our money investigating, prosecuting and incarcerating non-violent offenders, billions of dollars would be saved annually.
3. Decriminalize all "victimless crimes." No victim, no crime. See #2 above, and add billions more in savings, from incarceration expenses alone.
4. Return all federal lands to the states and eliminate all national forest, parks and monuments bureaucracies. The federal government owns Washington DC. Everything else belongs to the states and the citizens.
5. Eliminate all redundant federal bureaucracies, beginning with the TSA. Before the TSA, there was efficient, constitutional, non-invasive airport security. Those were the good ol' days.
6. Abolish the Fed and send those crooks to prison. After releasing all the potheads, there will be plenty of room. Replace the Federal Reserve counterfeit notes with a stable solid-asset currency, minted by the federal government or independent mints, including Indian nations. Currency based on pretty rocks would retain its value better than printing press paper.
7. Strike all regulations, taxes, fines and fees for engaging in free enterprise that have buried small businesses and favored giant corporations. You could virtually abolish everything and leave businesses alone unless they are engaging in fraud or crimes with victims. Hmmm, that would force lots of bureaucrats to pack their stuff and go get real jobs, like the rest of us.
8. I know you've got more ideas, don't you. So why not type some of them into the comments box below.
Do these ideas sound too extreme? Maybe our government would never do any of this? If you think so, please refer to the title of this short note. Now you know why.
What would need to be done if we were to have a balanced and stable budget and a sound economy? Here's my short, abbreviated list:
1. Remove all of our troops from everywhere except within the borders of the USA. Not just Libya and Iraq, EVERYWHERE. No more world-policing.
2. Decriminalize all drugs, not just marijuana. States should be solely responsible for substance abuse laws, and if the federal government stopped spending our money investigating, prosecuting and incarcerating non-violent offenders, billions of dollars would be saved annually.
3. Decriminalize all "victimless crimes." No victim, no crime. See #2 above, and add billions more in savings, from incarceration expenses alone.
4. Return all federal lands to the states and eliminate all national forest, parks and monuments bureaucracies. The federal government owns Washington DC. Everything else belongs to the states and the citizens.
5. Eliminate all redundant federal bureaucracies, beginning with the TSA. Before the TSA, there was efficient, constitutional, non-invasive airport security. Those were the good ol' days.
6. Abolish the Fed and send those crooks to prison. After releasing all the potheads, there will be plenty of room. Replace the Federal Reserve counterfeit notes with a stable solid-asset currency, minted by the federal government or independent mints, including Indian nations. Currency based on pretty rocks would retain its value better than printing press paper.
7. Strike all regulations, taxes, fines and fees for engaging in free enterprise that have buried small businesses and favored giant corporations. You could virtually abolish everything and leave businesses alone unless they are engaging in fraud or crimes with victims. Hmmm, that would force lots of bureaucrats to pack their stuff and go get real jobs, like the rest of us.
8. I know you've got more ideas, don't you. So why not type some of them into the comments box below.
Do these ideas sound too extreme? Maybe our government would never do any of this? If you think so, please refer to the title of this short note. Now you know why.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Being Alive, Living Awake
Being "alive" requires me to be the exact person God designed me to be. I'm not a member of the walking dead, I am fully living, and I know that "life is good," and here's why:
First of all, I wasn't designed to follow the herd, so I DON'T. And if I was intended to be a leader, people would follow me, and THEY DON'T. So I don't expect them to. I'm content knowing that I like people, but I'm not a member of a group, tribe, clique, gaggle or club. The direction my feet are turned is the direction I go, and if I go alone, it's probably because there's no trail that goes that direction. And most other people prefer to follow trails.
I have a unique blend of talents, hobbies, interests and passions, and there's probably no one else in the world who matches that exact blend, so the result is that I have lots of friends in life but no life partner. That's okay, because having nobody else telling me what I will or will not do with my talents, hobbies, interests and passions means that I am COMPLETELY FREE to live EXACTLY as the person I was designed to be. I am not a two-headed animal trying to travel in two opposite directions. That makes me efficient at being MYSELF.
Free from the herd, when I see evil and injustice in the world, there is nobody with so much influence over my thinking that they can convince me the evil and injustice is just a figment of my imagination. I see it, so I believe it. The herd may be looking at pop culture, sports and celebrity gossip, thinking those are the important things in life. Meanwhile, I don't know the rules of their games, I don't know who those celebrities are, I think their culture is stupid, and I'm looking the opposite direction anyway. I'm not watching TV, I'm looking out the window. And then I'm outside, and I'm walking around. I'm alive, breathing the air, living MY life, not the life of a celebrity on TV who's pregnant with an alien baby from an affair with a basketball player.
I tell people about the evils and injustices they would otherwise overlook because that's the right thing to do, NOT because I think most of them will listen or care. And since the majority of the herd of human sheep won't listen or care, I understand and accept the fact that evil and injustice will rule the land more often than good and justice. I understand that and I'm prepared for it, but that doesn't mean I'll keep silent when justice would have me be heard. What it means is that I won't follow them over any cliff. And it also means that if anyone at all listened when I spoke, those friends of mine won't jump either.
Because I am alive and awake, I am confident. When the storm comes, I have boarded my windows. I have battened down my hatches. I am docked securely in the harbor while others are still at sea, fated to drown. They've called me crazy or stupid. Now let's see what Fate calls them.
And that's the Master Plan. I was born to be myself, not someone else. To follow my path, not yours. The Master Plan was never even my own, and that's the beauty of it. It's the plan of someone far more brilliant, someone with flawless logic: the One who made me, designed my every detail at the drafting table. Every talent, hobby, interest and passion is part of that plan. I was put here on purpose and so were you. I was meant to be awake and alive, so were you. As different as we are, we are exactly alike: we're here for a reason, we came on a mission. But we can only fulfill our mission if we are awake, aware and SOBER. If you live awake, you'll live fulfilled. If you live asleep you'll die empty. But frankly, it's none of my business which way you choose. If you live dead, you're like all the rest of the plants and animals: everything that's born, that lives, that grows also dies. You can be food for worms if you like. All I can say is, this is my personal opinion: life is better than death. And in my experience, life is good!
First of all, I wasn't designed to follow the herd, so I DON'T. And if I was intended to be a leader, people would follow me, and THEY DON'T. So I don't expect them to. I'm content knowing that I like people, but I'm not a member of a group, tribe, clique, gaggle or club. The direction my feet are turned is the direction I go, and if I go alone, it's probably because there's no trail that goes that direction. And most other people prefer to follow trails.
I have a unique blend of talents, hobbies, interests and passions, and there's probably no one else in the world who matches that exact blend, so the result is that I have lots of friends in life but no life partner. That's okay, because having nobody else telling me what I will or will not do with my talents, hobbies, interests and passions means that I am COMPLETELY FREE to live EXACTLY as the person I was designed to be. I am not a two-headed animal trying to travel in two opposite directions. That makes me efficient at being MYSELF.
Free from the herd, when I see evil and injustice in the world, there is nobody with so much influence over my thinking that they can convince me the evil and injustice is just a figment of my imagination. I see it, so I believe it. The herd may be looking at pop culture, sports and celebrity gossip, thinking those are the important things in life. Meanwhile, I don't know the rules of their games, I don't know who those celebrities are, I think their culture is stupid, and I'm looking the opposite direction anyway. I'm not watching TV, I'm looking out the window. And then I'm outside, and I'm walking around. I'm alive, breathing the air, living MY life, not the life of a celebrity on TV who's pregnant with an alien baby from an affair with a basketball player.
I tell people about the evils and injustices they would otherwise overlook because that's the right thing to do, NOT because I think most of them will listen or care. And since the majority of the herd of human sheep won't listen or care, I understand and accept the fact that evil and injustice will rule the land more often than good and justice. I understand that and I'm prepared for it, but that doesn't mean I'll keep silent when justice would have me be heard. What it means is that I won't follow them over any cliff. And it also means that if anyone at all listened when I spoke, those friends of mine won't jump either.
Because I am alive and awake, I am confident. When the storm comes, I have boarded my windows. I have battened down my hatches. I am docked securely in the harbor while others are still at sea, fated to drown. They've called me crazy or stupid. Now let's see what Fate calls them.
And that's the Master Plan. I was born to be myself, not someone else. To follow my path, not yours. The Master Plan was never even my own, and that's the beauty of it. It's the plan of someone far more brilliant, someone with flawless logic: the One who made me, designed my every detail at the drafting table. Every talent, hobby, interest and passion is part of that plan. I was put here on purpose and so were you. I was meant to be awake and alive, so were you. As different as we are, we are exactly alike: we're here for a reason, we came on a mission. But we can only fulfill our mission if we are awake, aware and SOBER. If you live awake, you'll live fulfilled. If you live asleep you'll die empty. But frankly, it's none of my business which way you choose. If you live dead, you're like all the rest of the plants and animals: everything that's born, that lives, that grows also dies. You can be food for worms if you like. All I can say is, this is my personal opinion: life is better than death. And in my experience, life is good!
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